Have you ever paused to ask this one simply but seemingly important question: what creates happiness in our lives? It’s an interesting question to think upon, as is this—have you ever noticed how much happier children are as compared to adults?
As we grow up we seem to lose that innate ability for joy in favour of being serious and having “grown-up” problems (and especially at this time of year we can feel like we are turning into the Christmas Grinch!). Have we really lost it? Or have we perhaps just got lost in misidentifying what actually creates happiness?
“Happiness is the natural state you choose when you are not choosing against you.”
My friend and business partner, Gary Douglas, realized many years ago that when you judge yourself and when you do not see that you are actually a gift on this earth, you are actually choosing against the possibility of happiness.
“If you could see how amazing you are as a being, as a person, and as a contribution in life, then you would have no excuse for being unhappy.” – Gary Douglas
Have you noticed that when you are not judging yourself or anything or anyone around you, you feel lighter and happier? What if letting go of judgment, and choosing happiness was a simple moment-by-moment decision that you can make?
I can hear some of you asking: If happiness is just a choice—if it’s just as simple as “I choose to be happy now,” why is it I so often feel unhappy or unsatisfied?
Well, here’s the weird thing: on this planet and in society we seem to be validated more for being unhappy than happy. When you are sad or upset, many people will come alongside of you to ask, “what’s wrong? Are you ok?” Sometimes, that’s the only time we are ever given any attention, or receive that somebody even cares about us! When we ARE happy, people will ask what drug we’re on, or “Why are you so happy?” as if we need some reason or justification for not being miserable, sad or whiney.
Another weird thing is that 98% of your thoughts, feelings and emotions don’t actually belong to you! Did you know that? It’s true! We all tend to pick up and carry thoughts, feelings and emotions from the people around us. This may sound a little odd, but have you ever walked into a room and instantly known the mood of the person or people in there? Sometimes you can even sense it before you’ve made eye contact with anyone, or before they turn to you and speak a word. It’s the same thing, except you are receiving information from everywhere, all of the time, from lots of people numerous times a day and not even realizing it!
5 Simple Ways to Be Happy
With this in mind, there are a few really simple tools I would like to invite you to play with to find your ‘happy place’ more easily. These tools have personally helped me dynamically in my life, and still do day-to-day!
Happiness Tool #1:
The moment you become aware that you’re not happy, ask yourself “Who does this belong to”? When you ask “Who does this belong to?” and it lightens up or alleviates, even just a little, then it’s not yours to own! Just return it to sender.
Happiness Tool #2:
When something goes wrong, ask yourself, “How does it get any better than this?” We often think if something “bad” or not so great happens, we’re stuck with it and we can’t change it. If you ask this question, you give up being stuck and open the door to finding out how it can change and get better.
Happiness Tool #3:
Let go of judgments of yourself and others. Most of us have judged ourselves non-stop for most of our lives. Judgment is the fastest way to kill happiness and kill possibilities. The next time you catch yourself going into judgment, see a big red STOP sign in front of you, and stop! Ask, “What other choice do I actually have available here?”
Happiness Tool #4:
“Where gratitude blooms, happiness ensues”. Take time to look at what you are grateful for in your life, and about you. Acknowledge that you are the one who created having these things in your life – maybe you are a little (or a lot) more brilliant than you think you are!
Happiness Tool #5:
Hang out with happy people! If you don’t know any happy people, ask, “What would it take for more happy people to show up in my life?” Then make a conscious effort to welcome these people into your life.
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The really awesome thing about choosing to be happy, choosing gratitude and choosing to let go of judgment is it becomes an invitation for the people around you to choose it too! What if you choosing to be happy is the Christmas gift or New Year’s resolution that this world needs?
About the Author
An energy transformation virtuoso, author, international speaker and workshop facilitator, Dr. Dain Heer is best known for his unique energetic transformation process, called The Energetic Synthesis of Being. Dain is a Doctor of Chiropractic, born and raised in California, USA. He hosts a regular radio show entitled Conversations in Consciousness. He appears regularly on Dr. Pat and Voice of America and has been a guest on hundreds of nationally syndicated radio shows. He also has appeared on several TV shows including Fox News, Good Morning Shows in New Zealand, Australia and Canada and on Gaiam TV. Dain is the author of nine books on the topics of embodiment, healing, money and relationships. His latest book is, ‘Being You, Changing the World’.
You have shared some great suggestions for happiness. So many times happiness is a choice and a way of thinking. I do think there are some situations where happiness is not about choice. For example, those who struggle with hormonal and chemical imbalances and suffer with depressive conditions. Thanks for sharing great tips. Stay happy. = )
Irish